Return to Shiva Station: Kailash Connection

Return to Shiva StationProducer: Ben Leinbach, Jai Uttal
Label: Sounds True

The artistic temperament is always looking forward toward new levels of refinement, new colors and moods of expression, new ways to manifest and communicate the deepest feelings of the heart. The soul of the Bhakta (one endeavoring to walk the yogic path of devotion) is also always looking forward toward meeting the Beloved, experiencing the play of love, seeing His beautiful face, somehow discovering the key to divine love and service in this world. When combined, devotion and art create an inner world of turbulent longing, of passionate experience, of deep emotion. Read the life stories of the poet saints of India and you’ll know what I mean. (Please don’t think I’m comparing myself to those amazing beings! But they are my inspiration.)

When I was first asked to “remake” my album, Shiva Station, my response was, “No way! I can’t go backwards—that was then, and this is now! At this moment, I have so many new songs coursing through me.” I was very resistant, to say the least. My sweet little ego can sometimes speak very loudly. But after thinking about it for a while, I began to see the idea through fresh eyes. I reflected that the thread woven through all of my music, from my very first album, Footprints, to my last Kirtan Kids project is God’s names, and a deep, non-verbal longing for divine grace. Why not revisit my music from fifteen years ago to discover what, if anything, was timeless in each song? So I accepted the challenge.

Returning to this album wasn’t always a comfortable process, not that recording an album ever is. You know how every melody is filled with memories? Well, many of those memories were pretty harsh. Imagine going through a box of photos from a period of your life when you were very unhappy and out of balance. While I had the same devotional practices and feelings in those days, I also felt I was struggling just to be alive, to keep my head above the raging sea. Nonetheless, I dived in and lo and behold, the process turned out to be deeply healing and inspiring—both musically and spiritually. Through each of these songs I was able to reconnect with my soul, my Guru, my Beloved, remembering how desperately they were sung fifteen years ago and resinging them with a new mood of gentleness, surrender, and acceptance.

I sincerely hope that you, the listener, will enjoy the results of this process. I’m consistently humbled and honored when people tell me that my music has helped them through their life’s challenges. With Return to Shiva Station, may our journey together through this strange and wondrous world continue in love, joy, and grace.


1. Guru Brahma
2. Shiva Station (Namah Shivaya)
3. Hari Guna Gao
4. Calling You
5. Malkouns (Night On The Ganges)
6. Rama Raghava
7. Bhajore
8. Corner
9. Sita Ram
10. Jaya Jagadambe (She Who Tears Apart Thought)
11. Never Turn Away


1. Guru Brahma

Akhanda Mandala Akaaram, Vyaaptam Yena Cara Acaram Tat Padam Darshitam Yena, Tasmai Shrii Gurave Namah

Salutations to the Guru whose form is everything, and who pervades the entire animate and inanimate creation, who—out of Grace—gives us the Darshan of His Lotus Feet. Salutations to that Guru.

Ajnyaana Timirandhasya, Jnyaananjana Shaalaakayaa Cakssuunmilitam Yena, Tasmai Shrii Gurave Namah

Salutations to the Guru who removes the darkness of ignorance from our blind eyes by applying the collyrium of knowledge. By whom our inner eyes are opened; salutations to that Guru.

Gurur Brahmaa, GururVishnu, Gururdevo Maheshvarah Guru Sakshat Param Brahma, Tasmai Shrii Gurave Namah

The Guru is Brahma, the creator. The Guru is Vishnu, the preserver. The Guru Deva is Maheswara Shiva, the destroyer. The Guru is truly the Para-Brahman (Supreme God); salutations to that Guru.

Dhyaana Muulam Gurur Muurtih Puujaa Muulam Gurur Padam Mantra Muulam Gurur Vaakyam Moksha Muulam Guruur Krpaa

The Root of Meditation is the Form of the Guru. The Root of Worship is the Feet of the Guru. The Root of Mantra is the Word of the Guru. The Root of Liberation is the Grace of the Guru.

2. Shiva Station (Namah Shivaya)

Namaha Parvati Bhakta Hey Hara Hara, Namah Shivaya Adyanatha Chandranatha Namah Shivaya

I salute Goddess Parvati, the Beloved of Shiva. I bow to Shiva, the Ocean of Auspiciousness, Primordial Lord, Master of the Moon. I salute Lord Shiva

3. Hari Guna Gao

Hari Guna Gao, Radha Guna Gao, Krishna Guna Gao;

Sing of the qualities of Hari, of Radha and Krishna:

Govinda Jaya Jaya Gopala Jaya Jaya
Radha Ramana Hari Govinda Jaya Jaya

Victory to Radha and Krishna, the eternal lovers.

4. Calling You

A desert road from Vegas to nowhere, some place better than where you’ve been, a coffee machine that needs some fixing in a little cafe just around the bend.

I am calling you.
Can’t you hear me?
I am calling you.

A hot dry wind blows right through me, the baby’s crying and I can’t sleep
but we both know a change is coming closer, sweet release.

I am calling you.
Can’t you hear me?

5. Malkouns (Night On The Ganges)

Om Namo Bhagavate Vasudevaya

Om, I bow to Lord Vasudeva, or Lord Krishna

Om Namo Narayanaya

Om, I bow to Lord Narayana, or Lord Vishnu

6. Rama Raghava

Rama Raghava Rakshamam, Krishna Keshava Pahimam, Rama Krishna Hare, Mukunda Murare, Rama Krishna Hare

Oh Rama, my protector, Oh Krishna, my savior

7. Bhajore

Om Guru, Om Guru,
Oh Bhajore Oh Bhajore,
Dildoreeay Uttilay Toopan, Kejaney Ashan Oh Doyala Guru Bhajore.
Jay Guru Deva

I bow to the Supreme Guru,
Sing, sing of the Guru,
In the river of the heart a storm is raging. Who can bring relief? Sing to the Guru!
Victory to the Guru who is God.

8. Corner

The mirror of the sky reflects my soul,
The mirror of the sky reflects my soul.
Oh Baul of the road, Oh Baul my heart,
what keeps me tied to the corner of the room, what keeps me tied.

A storm’s raging in my crumbling hut.
The water’s rising to my bed.
My quilt is floating on the rolling flood,
bringing my shelter down.

Sri Ram Jay Ram Jay Jay Ram Om.

Victory to Lord Ramachandra and His beloved Sita

9. Sita Ram

Sita Ram

Goddess and God

10. Jaya Jagadambe (She Who Tears Apart Thought)

Jaya Jagadambe Durge Durge Durge, Oh Maa,
Devi Durga Bhavani, Jagata Janani, Devi Durga Rudrani, Oh Maa

Victory to the Mother of the Universe, Goddess Durga, Goddess Bhavani, Goddess Rudrani, Mother of all the worlds

11. Never Turn Away

Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare

The great Mantra of the Holy Names of the divine couple, Radha and Krishna

Where will I be tomorrow
And where am I today
Have I built my love on shadows
Just to watch it slip away
Hold me like you did a long long time ago

Promises were broken
Our lives went astray
But I always held you in my heart
I never turned away
Hold me like you did a long, long time ago


Jai Uttal—lead vocals, guitar, banjo, cigar-box, melodica, harmonium, ektar, and glockenspiel
Ben Leinbach—bass, keyboard, percussion, and backup vocals
Jose Neto—guitar
Prajna Vieira—backup vocals
Yoed Nir—cello
Timothy White—sitar

Produced by Jai Uttal and Ben Leinbach
Engineered, recorded and mixed by Ben Leinbach at Old Bull Studios, San Anselmo, California.

All songs by Jai Uttal except: “Never Turn Away,” by Jai Uttal and Krishna Das; “Calling You,” by Bob Telson; and “Corner,” lyrics are public domain.

Sanskrit, Hindi, and Bengali lyrics are traditional and public domain, thank God!

Published by Pavana Suta Music(BMI)c1997, except track 4: Boodle Music(BMI) and track 11: Pavana Suta Music(BMI)/Mustamullah Music(BMI)
Management: Invasion Group—Steven Saporta, Steve Dalmer, and Peter Casperson


At this late date in my life, I’m finally just beginning to change from a glass-half-empty kind of person to someone who knows that even if there is but a single drop of water on the tip of my tongue I’m doing ok and God is with me.

Thank you to my friends and family; my fans and fellow kirtan lovers; my managers, Steven and Steve; all the musicians who I’ve ever played or sung with from every corner of the Earth; Ben, who, once again, accomplished the dubious miracle of finishing this album under budget and under time; Jose, Yoed, Tim, and Prajna, who made this music come alive; and most of all, thank you to my Nubia and my Ezra Gopal, Maharajji and Siddhi Ma, Rama, Sita and Hanuman, Shiva Mahadeva, and, finally, that blue-skinned flute player, Govinda, and His beloved Radha Rani….

Jai Uttal Kirtan